Phenotype is a composite of an organism’s observable characteristics or traits;
a phenotype results from the expression of an organism’s genes as well as the influence of environmental factors and the interactions between the two

Where is the limit between somebodies phenotype and the “self-defined” part of his/hers personality?
To what point do we turn a blind eye to somebodies mistakes because “they were raised that way” ?

To what extent are we shaped by our nurture and culture? Isn’t there a time in every-ones life where you start questioning the information you have been served by your closest influences ? Isn’t there a learning curve in life which teaches you to adjust the previously learned behavior to the given situation and the needs/expectations of your new surroundings?

In my personal experience a lot of people keep on blindingly following the rules, norms, behavior patterns and beliefs they were served. (Ironically they are more certain in them then the others are in the beliefs they built by themselves.)
So how do you even put a limit of tolerance when there is nothing to put it on?

Personally I am done with excusing grown ass people with “they are raised that way” or “it’s just their culture” because people are more than their background, and they are able to grow and adjust.
I don’t care from what culture you come from, respecting others, and acting accordingly in any given situation is just common sense.
There is no excuse in your past for being an asshole.
If you don’t believe me, look it up.

: evidence that tends to prove a fact by proving other events or circumstances which afford a basis for a reasonable inference of the occurrence of the fact at issue

What does that have to do with anything? Everything.
Everything has to be seen within circumstances in which it happened.
You can’t truly understand anything without knowing what led to it’s becoming.

And as usual I am, mostly, talking about people and their mutual relations.
On Erasmus you can see that the most.
People who wouldn’t even speak to each other under the “normal circumstances” now are best friends. Girls and guys that don’t even live in the same “world” back home are in more healthy relationships than they ever were with someone they are actually compatible with.
So how did that happen?

It’s simple. People need people. And people are able to adapt to the situation.
So when there are no “first choices” they make the most of what they got.
But don’t be mistaken. It doesn’t mean that their feelings are any less true.
The catch is in that, that they know “this is not the real world”,
which means most of the things they would mind in a normal situation don’t really matter.
Their relations don’t have a future, and by knowing that, they become far more flexible.
In these relationships fights don’t even exist. Fights are useful when building long lasting relationships.
No future to build, no fights.

So enjoy your temporary relationships as much as you can because when you think about it, they offer you a chance of having pure feeling again, like when you were still a kid. When your criteria for friends was that they make you laugh, and for “boy/girlfriend” that they are cute.
And if you are not in the situation like this, learn from it.
Ask yourself why are you so choosy ?
Does “that thing” really matter ?
Why not give it a try ?

LESSON 1 – Energy never goes away,the total amount always stays the same.
Energy never disappears, it just changes it’s form.
Your life is actually kind of a perpetum mobile.
Nothing ever stops, it just changes from one thing to another.

For example you never stop being,  but you change from a baby to a child, to a teenager, to an adolescent, to a grown ass person and to an older person.
Accordingly, your titles in other peoples lives change. First you are somebodies daughter/son, then a friend, girlfriend, fiancee, wife/husband…etc.

The same goes for everything in your life. Nothing ever stops. You never lose anything, and nothing/no one ever loses you. So don’t ever be sad because something is over.
It’s not, believe me.
Change your view on things and realize nothing is ever lost, it has just changed.
When you end a relationship you haven’t lost a boyfriend/girlfriend they just ditched the boy/girl part and now they are your friends.
When an experience in your life is at it’s end it is really not because it will turn into a memory which has consequences in reality that prove it’s not over.
Take Erasmus for example. After that 6 months / 1 year you will leave and go back to your “normal” life but your Erasmus it’s not over. It is just that it’s not your life anymore but just one part of it and you will continue living that part true your new found friends.
That leads us to the next lesson.

LESSON 2 – Every action causes a reaction.
Everything that has happened during your entire lifetime causes a reaction, changes something inside you.
Every single person, every single event, every single second of every single day combined,
made you who you are in this moment.
That is another reason not to be sad when something is “over”.
Even if it is “over” or changed, the mere fact that it has happened makes it a part of you forever.
As I already said. Nothing ever stops, it just changes from one thing to another.

Sometimes you just have a burning desire to make your toughs shut the fuck up and let you enjoy the silence for a little while.
If you are not naturally talented for that (read: stupid) it can be almost mission impossible to do so.
Luckily there is alcohol and some other substances that can help you to forget to think … among other, equally lovely, side effects.
But why do we want not to think? After all isn’t that the one thing that makes us different from animals?
Maybe it is, maybe it isn’t. But sometimes it feels good just to be an animal.
This might sound slutty, stupid or just senseless but just think about it.
Animals don’t worry about stupid shit like “what color should I paint my nails”, or the more important stuff like how to manage your budget for the month. Animals don’t have obligations or duties. They don’t know the meaning of being stressed. They don’t know what is regret and they never think about the past or future. They live in present tense, the here and now, not then and there.
So why can’t we do that?
Is evolution actually a way to our end? Have we gone to far? Should we take a few steps back?

WHO GIVES A FUCK!
That should be the right answer. Because in here and now I can’t do anything about those questions, and worrying about them won’t change a fucking thing.
So I should just stop thinking about it. But I can’t.
In order to kill those thoughts, and all the other ones, I have to put my brain in stand by mode in some way.
And after I do so I feel like I have to justify my decision to the world.
Explain why do I undermine myself. Why don’t I use my full potential.
The answer is: I need a brake from myself.
…and in that name: Cheers! /  Kippis! / Nazdrvje! / Živili!

“Is it possible to fall in love without it ending in blood,sperm, and tears?”*

Probably not.
Falling in love is scary exactly because we now it will eventually end up with pain.
But that doesn’t mean we shouldn’t do it just because we are aware of that fact.
It’s like boxing in a way. You know that you will get a few punches but the fear of that doesn’t stop you from getting into the ring. Because the feeling you get from fighting overcomes the fear of getting hurt.
When the match is over and you come out as the winner, you forget that there is blood dripping down your forehead and that you have a huge black eye that is gonna require half a kilo of make up to cover. And when you heel you always look at your scars and think of that moment and smile.
Because then you were on top of the world, and the scars take you back to that feeling and you are able to feel it again.
It’s similar in relationships, it’s just that in that case the wounds not visible by the naked eye.
And when they heal you can go back in time and smile because then you won’t be sad it has finished.
You will be happy that it happened.

And the whole point of why to fall in love is that smile. Smile you get when someone says his/her name. Smile you get when he/she sends you a message. Smile with witch you wake up knowing you will see his/her face first thing when you open your eyes.
That smile is probably the most beautiful thing you can see on another human being.
It’s not our ability to think, or our ability to invent and research that make us worth the space which we occupy on this Earth.
It’s our ability to fall in love. To feel this amazing bundle of whatever it is towards another human being and to let go to that completely. Falling in love is what keeps us going as a species. It’s what makes us create the world around us and all the beautiful things in it.
And if it was safe it would’t be called falling.
If it was safe it wouldn’t be so beautiful.
If it was safe it wouldn’t be worth it.
So let yourself fall and enjoy the way down.
And when you get hurt just smile,
because you were one of the lucky ones.
You were in love.

Smoking is going to give you cancer.
Marijuana is a gateway drug.
If you drink alcohol you are going to kill someone.
Sex is a dangerous activity that is only going to give you disease and/or unwanted children.

Guess what … I don’t give a fuck!
I don’t eat healthy, I drink (sometimes excessively), I run only when faced with life threatening danger and I love having sex.
Yes I said it. I love sex.

I don’t understand the human need to deny yourself pleasure because of something or someone.
( That someone usually being God or other idol in your life. )
I don’t know how to say this but, there is no afterlife. This right here, this is it. This is all you get.
You only got one ride on this carousel  called life and you better use it wisely.

Why is drinking a good choice you might ask. Because I enjoy it. I don’t say that running is a bad choice
but I personally don’t like running. You should do whatever you like and because it’s ok to be a hedonist.
It’s ok to drink until you puke and then drink some more, like Romans used to.
If that is what you enjoy doing that is fine with me.

So, live it up while you are still here. Drink, fuck, smoke, eat ….run for all I care, and don’t forget to enjoy every minute of it.
Feel everything, don’t be afraid to try and don’t listen to what other say to much. Don’t take life to seriously. Don’t take me to seriously … to be honest I am hangover as fuck.

I guess, if you really think about it, all relationships in our lives have some kind of an expiration date.

When you are young you make friends based the fact that they live near you and you can play with them,
but while you grow as a person and start shaping your personality some of your relationships goes “bad” and
somehow fade away to become only good memories.
You probably wouldn’t be able to have a half-decent conversation with half of the people you once called
best friends, and thought you will fight the world together…when you grow up.
That is exactly it…we grow up…we grow as people…we grow old…And in that process some of our relationships get “outdated” and “old”.

That leads to the following questions.
How can we know what makes the relationship “go bad”?
How can we now it’s “expiration date” and are we able to change it?

In my opinion good relationships never go bad, they are like sugar.
It doesn’t matter what kind they are they go bad, they can only get rock hard.
Relationships that went bad, were probably bad from the beginning, but you couldn’t see it while they were still fresh.
Like bread. You can try to toast after it’s expatriation date,
but it’s hard to ignore it is past it’s due when the mold starts to show.

So why do we toast our relationships?
Because we are humans, we have emotions and we let them shape our decisions.
We ignore the hard crust because we know there is still some parts of it where the middle is still soft.
We choose to live on hope it will be as it was, that  it will get better.
But it doesn’t get better, it gets worse because decomposition is not a reversible process.

So next time  look for the signs it’s going bad, pay attention to the expiration date and don’t consume it after that date.
Invest in good relationships and end the bad ones before they make you sick to your stomach.